Appropriate Blonde Jokes
The blonde jokes below are from the book 100% Blonde Jokes. Check it out now for 100s of appropriate blonde jokes.
Your Kid Has Been Kidnapped A blonde, out of money and down on her luck after buying air at a real bargain, needed money desperately. To raise cash, she decided to kidnap a child and hold him for ransom. She went to the local playground, grabbed a kid randomly, took her behind a building, and told her, “I’ve kidnapped you.” She then wrote a big note saying, “I’ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and leave it under the apple tree next to the slides on the south side of the playground. Signed, A blonde.” The blonde then pinned the note to the kid’s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the apple tree. The blonde looked in the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, “How could you do this to a fellow blonde?”
She Was Soooo Blonde… – She thought a quarterback was a refund. – She thought General Motors was in the army. – She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats. – She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center. – At the bottom of an application where it says ‘Sign here:’ she wrote ‘Sagittarius.’ – She took the ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
Acute Appendicitis A blonde was having sharp pains in her side. The doctor examined her and said, ”You have acute appendicitis.” The blond yelled at the doctor… ”I came here to get medical help, not get a stupid compliment!”
Helping An Overweight Blonde An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor advised that she run ten miles a day for thirty days. This, he promised, would help her lose as many as twenty pounds. The blonde followed the doctor’s advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she had indeed lost the pesky twenty pounds. She phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, she asked one last question: “How do I get home, since I am now 300 miles away?”
Parachute Jumping On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet. The blonde asked, “How am I supposed to know when I’m at 300 feet?” “That’s a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground.” After pondering his answer, she asked, “What happens if there’s no one there I know?”
Read 100s more great blonde jokes from the best joke book ever: 100% Blonde Jokes. Check it out, you will thank me…
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